Did you miss me? Feels like it has been forever since I’ve posted an update. We’re back in Michigan and you know how it is when you go home for a visit, you never have the time you think you’ll have.
Because it has!
In the last post Apricot started seeing Steven Bronx, Frittata and Juice grew up and Kiwi is pregnant.
Here is a shot of Frittata after the patch. Check out that skin!
Whoa! She looks like a burn victim!
Except she’s not.
During the time Fritatta was a teenager she was caught out after curfew. Her adoptive mother, Butter was not happy with her.
No wonder. Have you had a look at her. Do you know how hard it would be to find her at night!!!
Frittata ran into the house to escape Butter’s wrath, but it was not over. Butter followed her and launched another attack. Butter threatened to bring out the Monkey DNA if Frittata ever stayed out after curfew again.
Damn you Donut! You and your hidden Monkey DNA.
Once the eruption was over, Butter did a 180 and was very concerned as to why Frittata was so upset. Frittata just wanted to escape to a far off place
What a psycho! I am so glad I am perfectly normal.
Whatever “normal” is in your world.
Come to find out Butter was pregnant again.
Oh great, another chinless wonder.
I know you’re excited Edamame, you’re just having a hard time showing it.
Yeah, that’s it.
In other news Apricot invited her boy toy over to spend the night.
Gouda was torn between being upset with her mother for the affair and being fiendishly delighted about the pain the whole thing caused Budweiser. Budweiser was so upset over the entire thing that he that he broke off their marriage.
FINALLY!!! I am so happy I don’t have to see his face again!
At the same time downstairs…
The family was eating a dinner of stale birthday cake, Juice was strangling himself, Kung Pao was choking on his cake, Kiwi was showing and Nutmeg started to float beside the table.
Kung Pao’s Plumbob is showing, how embarrassing. And Juice is most likely angry with his neck for stealing the chin off his face.
Nutmeg died. It seems the stress of thinking Kiwi was again pregnant with Death’s baby was just too much for dear Nutmeg.
Those sparkles kind of tickle don’t they? Nutmeg…Nutmeg? You know, I’m really tired of your moody silent treatments.
Edamame, Nutmeg isn’t here. She’s reunited with Nouget and decided not to join us any longer.
What a bunch of llama crap! I’m here, I’ve stuck it out this long.
You chose not to leave.
Whatever, I don’t remember it that way.
Steven was sad to see Nutmeg go…
He would have cried like that for me, I just know it.
But then he remembered that he had just nailed Apricot.
I wouldn’t mind seeing him without a shirt on. Maybe it’s time to get this family a hot tub.
Nice try, I don’t have Late Night yet.
You’re always ruining my fun.
Later that night Apricot and Steven celebrated her divorce from Budweiser. Kung Pao stool by and happily gave them his blessing.
OMG!!!! Dreams DO come true!!! And it’s even better…NO PANTS!
And he creepily hung out there staring at Steven the…whole…time.
Eh, can’t say I blame him really. I’m thinking about following Steven around for a while. Maybe I’ll catch him in the shower…
*dreaming* …Did you say something?
That night Apricot made the decision to move out of the Legacy House. Before she left I heard a lullaby…
Budweiser was upset and cried for days over the divorce. The thing that really bothered Butter his lack of clothing. He was too depressed to wear pants and just roamed around in his underwear.
Well I hope he’s at least changed his underwear and it’s not stale with old butt sweat. How is Butter doing that with her arm?
I think she would rather break her arm than have to talk to Budweiser. Here is a closer look.
He invited Gladys over, she was the only one that understood him. The next morning Gladys did the walk of shame.
So why is Budweiser still in the house and when is he moving out?
Budweiser was hanging out at the park begging for funds when Kiwi, who was there also, went into labor. He kindly took her to the hospital and checked out her butt when they got there.
He has slept with all of the Food women.
What? No he hasn’t.
Yeah? Count them!
Apricot and Anise. Two!
Gladys and Sun Young. Hah! I win!
That’s only four. He hasn’t touched Butter, Kiwi or Nutella.
Clearly he wants Kiwi and I’m sure he’s thought about Butter and Nutella is barely a woman so she doesn’t count.
Whatever, you’re still wrong. Budweiser may think that Kiwi is easy pickings because her husband just died. I failed to capture a screenshot of the notice of Theodore’s death.
Budweiser decided to throw a fundraiser party at the house. Gladys was there, of course and Apricot dropped by to let everyone know she was doing great! Budweiser was checking out Carrie Whatsherface and Gladys was PO’d!
Hah, take that you tramp! You never answered me, WHY is Budweiser still in this house and Apricot is not?
Well, Budweiser thought that since Apricot was unfaithful she should be the one to leave the lot.
That makes no sense at all.
I know, it’s like talking to you, right?
Butter decided to sabotage Budweiser’s party by showing up in some lingerie.
Of course the baby chooses that moment to make an appearance and off to the hospital Butter went before she could ruin Bud’s reputation.
Too bad, that would have been great entertainment.
Here’s a little news! Nutella is having/had a baby! She had a boy named Bradford.
Too bad they now hate each other.
Well she was never a very pleasant person to begin with. I mean she certainly didn’t inherit my people skills.
Okay, this is where I need to leave this post. Join me next time when we find out what Kiwi and Butter’s babies will be and there are more birthdays!!!